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After a hiatus, here I am again! For those ardent readers (:P) who have been regularly checking my blog for updates, for ever increasing my ‘hits’,…I am back again. If you had figured this is the only way to actually hit me for torturing you with this blog, me liikkeeyyy….keep at it junta! If you had thought my previous posts were nonsensical characters put together in random order, then read on…another set of nonsensical characters put together to rhyme…for no particular reason!!!

It’s been an onerous week; I’ve been so busy,
Feeling so weak, energy sapped and so dizzy,
Inch by inch crawling,
My aching body I have been hauling,
The horizon is now in sight
I am running with all my might
Been there…done that
I would say when I jump up and throw my graduation hat.

What next I know not
I have my mind tied up in a knot
Whatever it is, I wanna giv it a shot
Cannot imagine being in a jobless drought.

Same time a year and a half ago
Fresh out of college, dangling like in an out of rhythm tango
Clueless as I ever was,
Sense and logic had taken a toss,
Clueless as I presently am,
I had set sail towards Uncle Sam.

A year and a half from then
This excuse of a poem I am trying to pen
Logic and clue still not in sight
I find myself in such a plight.
A Master’s is supposed to make me erudite?
If everyone would take that at face value, it would be such a delight.

A new degree thrust in my hand
A job I would be trying to land.
Come sixteenth this December,
It would be a day to remember
I would jump up and throw my graduation hat,
Been there…yeah, but done what??

-Hasta la vista!
PR.

Serenity- A review.

I am writing this after having seen a movie- Serenity, directed by Joss Whedon of Alien, Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Toy story fame.
The print of the movie was soooo bad and the sound effects were so horrible, that for most part of the movie I had to spend a great deal of energy trying to listen and understand what was being shown and said on screen! I can’t believe I spent…hey…wait a minute…I dint spend a penny…pst!! It’s a secret…I saw it on the small screen!(if u know wot I mean) ;)
This movie, I believe, is in line with a TV series called Firefly (I hadn’t heard of it before!) directed by Whedon.
Nathan Fillion plays Malcom Reynolds, who captains a spaceship with 5 crew members, and is on the run from the tyrannous Alliance which controls the universe( nothing close to Star Wars though!). They kidnap/reclaim their crew Doctor’s little sister River Tam (Summer Glau) from the clutches of the Alliance which has been telepathically traumatizing her as an experiment to develop a walking-talking mean fighting machine. The Alliance is eager to get her back and imprison/destroy Mal and his crew. How they fight against the strong Alliance, which sends a destructive and focused operative to finish the job, and how they discover the reason behind River’s bouts of extreme violence and great fighting skills and how they transmit (space-age) this news to all around the Universe, forms the rest of the story.
This is a great movie. It has the right amount of everything- from gripping action to emotion evoking scenes to great comedy/subtle humor.
My favorite character is Jayne played by Adam Baldwin. He is one of the crew and his comic timing is impeccable. A few of my fav scenes are-
1. When the crew gets cornered and there are Reavers (humans gone violent and berserk because of a failed experiment) and Alliance soldiers in their pursuit and one of the crew members asks “Do you really think any of us will make it out of here alive?”, there is a very inspiring music which plays, at the end of which Jayne says straight faced- “Well, I might!”.
2. Jayne and Mal have an altercation regarding the way Mal’s captaining the ship and he disagrees with one of Mal’s ideas, for which Mal, trying to assert his rank, screams-“Do you want to run this ship?”. “Yes!” Jayne says, taking Mal by surprise!!! Mal replies after stupefied silence and thought –“Well, you can’t!”
The special effects and the music are actually very good and I would really recommend watching the movie on the big screen. So if this movie releases on your part of the planet, I suggest you grab the tickets!!

A point about pointlessness

A good friend of mine pointed out that I have been choosing pointless topics for my blog and making pointless evaluations and arguments from day 1.
Have you heard of the folklore in which the subject of the story provides the stick with which he is beaten? This was a typical case of such an instance, because it was I who'd asked her to read the blog, and it was I who'd forced her to give her “frank” opinion on my blog, though she was initially reluctant to do so. But like all writers (if I may call myself that), I write to be read, and I am definitely open to criticism. I am thankful to her for two things,
1. for giving me her frank opinion.
2. for providing me with something to write about now!!!

What on earth should a topic contain to qualify as something worth a point? Considering the fact that my previous posts have been about India, politics in India, and about the plight of single guys around the world, I had thought nothing would be worthier of a mention. I possibly cannot expect her to understand the tribulations of single guys, because she happens to be a she. But if she had just reversed the genders in that particular post, I bet it would have made better sense to her because that is the ubiquitous truth. The anguish sketched has more to do with being single than to do with belonging to a particular gender.

“What else can I write on?” I asked her. “Something more melodramatic or melancholic” was her reply. “Well, for someone who is 22, what else can be darker and depressing than the topics I have covered?” I innocently shot back.

“Death or a natural calamity perhaps.” True! Absolutely true! But wouldn’t that be more like reporting and less like blogging? How much can I write about these without going into facts and figures? My heart sincerely cries for every life (human or otherwise) lost on this planet, period. There cannot be two opinions about it and definitely no discussion or debate at all.

“May be psychology” she continued. But then I have already ventured into this topic, trying to unravel the sub-conscious (deliberate?) deliberations of a lady when she chooses her boy friend.

“May be Philosophy then”…aah!!...now she’s got me thinking. But then, isn’t that a topic that is extremely relative? …Something that is extremely recondite? Some may see birth as the beginning, the first step towards inheriting this world and all the good and bad it has to offer. For others it may be the end of the surreal peace that the foetus enjoys in its mother’s womb. For some death may mean the destination, the end of an existence. For others it may mean the beginning of life beyond life, the continuation of a journey-the nature of which depends on our past actions, “karma”, if I may use an enigmatic word.
What is for one may not be the same for another. Have you ever wondered if how you appear to yourself in the mirror is how you appear to others too? Too intricate a question to disentangle in a single life-time.
Though philosophy is not something that is perspicuous, it definitely is something that is captivating. So, philosophy, the topic will have to be. Voila!!! And if this itself is not philosophic, then what is?

Indians Fourth Happiest??-Our Secret!!

I am writing this immediately after having read an article on Indians officially being declared the fourth happiest group of people in the whole wide world, according to some survey done by some market research company- GFK NOP!!
This may have come as a surprise to many around the globe, but being an Indian myself…this seems as obvious a declaration as watching the sun rise in the same east every damn day!!!
Only 3 other nations have a happier population than India.

The Australians: Why not? Their cricket team is doing extremely well…Some skeptics may be quick to point out their fresh loss to the English in the Ashes. But I think the Aussies did that on purpose. You know, just to add a human touch to their team. To emphatically tell the world “We know we are perfect, but see, we can get bored of winning too. And we are kind (don’t believe wot they say about sledging) and can let you win if we want to!” (This, I think is the same story behind my fav Schumi pretending to be out of touch this whole year!!! But that’s a different story.)
Even as England celebrated and their government made plans to “capture” their victory in a series of postage stamps, I could visualize the Australian team chuckling in their dressing room: “We have got the rest of the world thinking they actually have a chance against us!!! Boy!! Its gonna be fun when these chaps from around the world come home next month for the super series…should we just romp them or pretend like they have us with our backs to the wall? Anyways boys wipe that stupid grin off your faces and look sad at the presentation!!!”
I guess they decided to romp the World XI afterall, going by how the series is progressing!!!

The Americans: No surprises here!!! They are almost in control of all the oil in the Middle East!! They have made deals worth billions of dollars to sell military jet fighters to both India and Pakistan! No matter who goes to war, no matter who wins and who loses, they are in a strong position to make more money!!!
They have even twisted our arm to get us to vote against our long time friend-Iran, at the IAEA in Vienna. When all their plans are working at clockwork precision, I am surprised why they aren’t the #1 happiest!!

The Egyptians: These guys are soo mysterious and cryptic…remember what we learnt about their mummies????;) Wonder wot makes them sooo happy!!

Us, The Indians: I strongly believe we have always been the type to accept disappointment and take failures in our stride!! We are not known to be the brooding type. For example, look at the political scenario back home…we have backstabbed our long-time friend, Iran, upon outside pressure; there is trouble in Bihar (like there always is); there was a nationwide strike of employees in the public sector which disrupted normal life for almost a whole day a few weeks ago; and there are countless rapes, murders and thefts all around the country…at the political level (BJP leaders Mahajan and Ravi Shankar Prasad were recently shot at in an election rally in Bihar) and the general public level!!!
We have always endured the government’s dereliction, incompetence and non-performance(irrespective of who's in power) from time immemorial and still kept smiling. “Oh!! This politician did this? Thousands lost their jobs as a result? Shady contracts lead to these bad roads and crumbling fly-overs? And their poor planning leaves us with no water or electricity for 10 days…Man!! This is sad!! Anyways what are you doing for dinner? I know this fabulous restaurant…”

We know that only so much can be expected and never let the situation surprise or perturb us. This reminds me of what my guru Calvin once said, and I paraphrase:"Lower your expectations to a level at which they have already been met and thou shalt never be disappointed!!"
No wonder we are one among the happiest in this world!!!!!!

Praveen.

Inscrutable women

This is addressed to the ‘single’ guys on earth:

Have you ever noticed that all the beautiful women that you ever come across in life, have already been taken? While this one fact is, by itself, sufficient to annoy a guy who is single to death, it does not stop here. These beautiful women are going around with dunces, with guys you could do better than, even if you were just half as good as you already are!!! I find this aspect more annoying than the basic problem that gorgeous girls are no longer available.
I find it really tough to comprehend why girls have such a dumb taste when it comes to guys. In my never-ending quest to solve this question that has been baffling single guys all around the globe, I have come up with two theories.

The first one is plain and simple: It is just that girls are extremely insecure. Yes…can you believe it guys? The reason we are single, despite being drop-dead handsome, is not something to do with us at all. It is because the pretty ladies are an insecure lot. They are extremely possessive too and will not stand any other girl passing even a glance at their prized “possession” (here I mean their boy friend). They would rather spend their time with an unattractive dud than risk some other girl pass a yearning glance at their attractive boy friend (which would be one of us!). So, for them, the answer is, was, and will always be, (regrettably) simple: pick a guy whom no other girl would ever want. That way they would not have to bother about competition or about him being disloyal, because the fact that a pretty girl would fall for a guy like him would make him indebted and grateful to her for life!!! This attitude of the girls robs us, the good-looking guys, of any chance of getting a pretty girl.

Now the second theory. This one I don’t like very much…but I am going to say it anyways, because it seems to me like a plausible explanation. After all they say you got to see both sides of the coin! The reason why I don’t like it very much will be evident when you read through it:
The guy who is going around with this beautiful girl is in fact very handsome and in every sense better than what we are. (too hard to believe right? That is precisely why I don’t like it.) We just fail to see it because our eyes are covered with these giant green goggles that have “jealousy” written right across them in bold fonts. We would appear just as stupid and undeserving to him if it was one of us with the damsel instead of him. That, in effect, is relativity explained to you in as simple and relevant words as possible.

This theory, like I said, is not one of my favorites, and like what most good-looking single guys would do, I brush it aside for want of substantial and convincing proof, which I doubt I will ever find.

Whether you agree with the first theory or the second one, we all seem to see in the same direction with respect to one thing: good looking girls like bad-looking boys.
So if you are good-looking and tired of being single, then there is only one solution. Read on…Did you ever wonder why Devdas took to drinking and grew an unkempt beard? That was not failed love and crap guys!!! It was just his effort to be as clumsy as can be, and look as stupid and unattractive as possible, so that some other good looking girl would fall for him!
So if you find me walking around with tousled hair and a face that has not seen the razor in weeks, just take it that I am on the lookout for a girl, and sooner or later I am going to get one! But the sad part is that I, (similar to all those other single guys), have been cursed with such eternal beauty and grace, that all my efforts to look unrefined and unappealing are in vain.:D… What a predicament?!!

P.S if you do not concur with any of the points mentioned above, please bear in mind that I do not need a reality check!!!;)

Hey! How are you? How's school?

It is impossible to walk a mile through campus without bumping into an acquaintance or a friend who would first go: “Hey! How are you? How’s school?” If you are good pals, then the first few words are likely to revolve around a girl or a movie or a girl in a movie …. in most cases this will be the subject of the entire conversation. But that is not the topic of discussion here!

Hey! How are you? How’s school?
I have never been happier; everything’s going the way I want it to. Absolutely no worries or concerns. If I were to be any happier, there would have to be two of me, 'cos I am already holding all the happiness a single person could ever hold!!!! And school? School’s great, the courses are interesting and challenging and that is precisely the reason why I got myself enrolled in them. The professors are extremely kind when it comes to assignments and deadlines, and I am lovin every bit of school!!

Yeah right! Who you tryin to fool, kid? Every living being on this galaxy and beyond, who has been to school at some point in his/her life, knows that students cannot be happy studying and that school cannot be fun!

The truth? Well, I just got booted by my professor for not having done any work over the past two days, and I just spent 2 sleepless nights preparing for a test and now the test papers have been graded (you don’t even have to venture into discussing the results), and I was late to work again and was told not to bother to show up if I were to be late once more….but I am doing GREAT. Thanx for asking…and yeah about school? Don’t get me started!!Forget about it!!
School sucks and that’s the way it’s supposed to be. It was never designed to be fun in the first place. I have never known someone who has woken up and said, “Great!!! Thank God it’s not a Sunday. I have to go to school today and I m so excited!” Now don’t get me wrong here. I am not saying that no one actually enjoys going to school. If there is this lovely girl in your school and you have been trying to get to her for sometime...then school can be so much fun, at least while your interest in this lovely lass lasts!

Like I said, this education system was never designed to be fun. Even if it were, then it’s high time that the ones who designed it woke up and took note of the fact that it’s not functioning the way they thought it would. There are so many things that they try to teach at school that I am never going to use in my life, example...Mathematics. I belong to the league of guys who think mathematics is the earliest form of terrorism known to man. Throw me a mathematical problem and you will see how terrorized, terrified, stupefied and petrified I would be!! And I am sure I am not the only one here! I understand that almost all engineering subjects need at least a little bit of math. I will not be able to solve any system equation or vibration problem without the use of integration and differentiation. Agreed. But does this warrant an entire 200 page chapter dealing with differentiation and integration? And almost 10 different methods to solve the same stupid problem? Insanity...that’s what you can call it!

In spite of all these annoyances, most of us manage to give a straight answer to the most ridiculous of questions!! “Hey! How are you? How’s school?”
But the strange thing is that, we, being students ourselves, cannot stop our tongues from curling these words out…may be it’s just an effort to really figure out if there is someone who genuinely enjoys what he/she is doing!! I have not been lucky so far…but let me know if you find someone!

I am an INDIAN!!

Sitting alone at home one afternoon, I got bit by this mean looking bug. I panicked…not knowing what to do..afterall I had never seen a meaner looking bug, something that needs no provocation to bite. Some would place Homo sapiens in the same category but that’s all-together a different story.
Thoughts like “am I going to die of a bug bite so many miles from home?...should I call 911?” raced through my idle mind! Just then I realized and slapped myself :“I am an Indian”. No mean looking bug can hurt me. I have been seasoned by perennial mosquito, and ‘all-those-things-that-can-fly-and-bite’, bites. I realized actually how thankful I was for being born in India ….I need not worry about silly bug bites and that’s definitely a big thing.
Of late I have been swept over by this strong feeling of patriotism that I have never felt in the last 22 long years of my life. All the things that I used to despise so much, when I was in India, seem so surreal now. The walks down dusty and crowded streets during the hot summer days,( these Americans have no idea as to what “hot” or “summer” really means!!), the dirty water served in dirty tumblers in road side dhabbas, those roads built on pot holes!!!. I even miss those lazy and irate government officials that occupy the seats in every public “service” government office!! There was a time when I used to wonder if being scornful was a pre-requisite for landing yourself a job in a government run organization (government run organization?? wots it with me and these oxymorons????). Just imagine the selection procedure –“Alright…you look mean enough, and sound scurrilous, incoherent and barbarous, and you never look at people in the face when they talk to you or when you talk to them. You are the perfect guy to become the Head of the Customer Service Division in our dept.”
But I digress!
Where was I? ahh..patriotism!
I find myself jumping to the rescue of my nation when I hear Americans speak about poverty and unemployment in India. I almost get into a brawl when they talk about the roads and traffic discipline (rather the lack of these) in India. I see red instantaneously when they speak about oppression of women and female infanticide in India. My blood pressure sky-rockets when they speak of the lethargy of the government officials and their indifference towards the current state of affairs in India.
All these may be true..but as an Indian, it is my birth right to complain and speak ill of my country, and I am not going to share that right with some stupid guy from somewhere else!!!
My patriotism knows no bounds….well almost!